11:00p

And this is why you keep tabs on certain people. In my case, an old acquaintance from h.s.

Today I am feeling down, that I am not doing enough. That I am lazy, alone, but even when I'm not alone I would rather be alone. I am polar and contrary in an un-iconoclastic, thus uncool way. Uncool is a real word?

Anywho. I just went and checked up on this acq.'s blog and her most recent post addresses exactly my feelings of stagnation. That it's not really stagnation if you get out of your own skin a minute. I got tears. And I am reminded of my personal assurance that she was some overdramatic kook and I was the true blue, legit English student and writer. Sure, she was animated and overzealous and probably annoying. But I was an hypercritical, self-indulgent teen. Unlike the current self-indulgent, doubtful mid-20s version.

What I can extrapolate is: I'm definitely procrastinating, but procrastination does not a failure make. Gotta give myself a chance to breathe for Christ sakes.